Experiments

Whimsy is a weapon. Play with the safety off.

What follows is the deranged mad science experiments of one Revered Fitzgerald. No relation.

Deep beneath sea level, these experiments were kept safe and away from prying eyes, but now they roam the internet. Had god blinked? Had the ill-gotten Revered made a deal with the devil? Who can say? The result is the same— the circus has arrived, and you have forgotten to lock your door.

The Experiments

experiment #1: Mr. Square

A Black Comedy, Dada Comic that has haunted the internet since 2009. It stars the titular character “Mr. Square”, a clinically depressed doodle and a pathologically enthusiastic sheep as they make their way through a terrifying, existential, and often inconsistent landscape. According to its disclaimer, the comics are “…not proofread, and may have been created outside of sobriety” and that “the artist has little recollection of what they are about”. The image below will take you to a random comic. No, there is no other way to read them.

experiment #73

Disclaimer: The following comic has been randomly frankensteined together from 2484 unrelated panels. It will change every time you load the page. Look lively!

experiment #2: Kick the Football Chuck!

Kick The Football Chuck is a labor of love, but ultimately fear, dedicated to Charles Schulz. Fear, because Revered Fitzgerald has been threatened by the Ghost of Schultz to complete it or face “The howling Madness”, which is threatened on him every time he ignores the specter and considers seeing a psychoanalyst instead. The image below will take you to it:

This is one of the rare experiments that was documented in real-time. The image below will take you to the “Howling Madness Diaries”:

experiment #4: Fear and Loathing in Casino Night Zone

Reenacting literature with the Sega Genesis and a Super Nintendo was a bad idea. Hosting it on a resurrected Geocities page was even worse. This experiment might be the only time the mad doctor Reverend Fitzgerald showed constraint and put a bullet into it before more than one could be released. The reenactment of Orwel’s 1984 with Super Mario Bros remains locked away forever. The image below will take you to Fear and Loathing in Casino Night Zone:

experiment 30: Æsir at Minimum Wage

The recession hit everybody, and the Old Gods were no exception. Thor and his Uncle Loki must make ends meet. The image below will take you to these sacred myths:

experiment #754-B: The masses

Monitoring the public and its reaction to the PSYOPs comics is an important task. For reasons that are still not understood some of the public reacted by getting tattoos, committing public vandalism, and more.

“Balloonatic” is the activation word.

experiment 3: …

We just wanted to show you this one. Like, we really don’t know much about it? It was an experiment and it existed and here it is. That’s all.

About+Contact

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It’s 3:00 A.M.

My drunken guests look upon me with a mixture of confusion and pity as I rant about an idea that I want to share with them. When no one laughs I repeat, but louder this time, with the suspicion that no one heard me. When I finish I rush to my desk as quickly as possible, I don’t want to lose this. My belligerent scribbling sheds hard onto the table and I look upon my creation. Glory. I giggle madly and then fall into a sleeping abyss.

It’s 12:00 P.M.

A vague feeling of guilt echoes above my unforgiving hangover as light intrudes into my eyes. I trudge reluctantly to my desk and find the work of my drunk counterpart. Weight is added to my headache as I finish reading it and I try desperately to make sense of the punchline. I allow this futility to pass and drop the comic with the others, and realize now, with a dreadful clarity that there is now a PILE of them. Dear god. I fall back into my cot and plan a way for others to suffer from these comics, and my dreams taunt me.

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Send all questions, rants, and death threats to Reverend Fitzgerald at:

contact@revfitz.com