Existential Terror and Breakfast: 20

Epiphanies taste better with toast.


Stars are the most massive, furious objects that can be seen with a naked eye. They burn so immensely hot that they fuse matter and are so gargantuan that the pull of their gravity keeps objects named after the gods prisoners.They are so impressive, so astounding that when they die they engulf everything around them in fire. Their corpses, (black holes) EAT LIGHT.

They live for billions of years. Without the shine from their furry, there would be no life.

Yet all of their hatred is but a feeble whisper in the great void that they reside.Continue reading →

Existential Terror and Breakfast: 19

Epiphanies taste better with toast.

Malcolm Steadman will be homeless in 90 days.

Malcolm Steadman honestly did not know which was more awkward: the ride in the ambulance to the hospital, or the ride in the beat up van to the psychiatric ward for involuntary holding. Though terrifying, at least Malcolm was drunk on the ambulance. There was no going back, there was no more denying, Malcolm Steadman is not normal. This felt nice.

Normal people do not suffer from an anxiety so intense that the slightest of thing sets them off on an existential crisis that is paralyzing. Normal people do not suffer from existential episodes so terrifying it makes their knuckles white from pressure and their sweat cold from adrenaline. Normal people DO NOT call up customer service hotlines as a surrogate therapist and they certainly do not substitute said hotlines with the suicide prevention hotline when customer service no longer gives them their “fix”. Normal people do not use drug vernacular to describe calling a customer service hotline.Continue reading →

New Mr. Square Fan Art!

In place of the normal Mr. Square comic I would like to take the time to showcase a very awesome fan piece made by Pheenixorphan:

Pheenixorphan is one awesome artist with a gallery of charmingly dark and macabre art with an original taste. They represent the best of the DeviantArt community: they are active and engaged with other artist, are witty, and are an overall positive with others. Check out her gallery and her profile while you have the time!

I am overwhelmed by the awesome people who have enjoyed Mr. Square and who have contributed fan art. Without fail every piece that is sent to me is better drawn than my own and without fail it is done by someone who I admire. You are all incredibly glorious people, and I am incredibly lucky to have the fan base that I do. It is reassuring to know that I am not the only person with this brand of madness. Thank you 🙂

The comic will resume as usual next week and a new entry to Existential Terror and Breakfast will be up this Wednesday.

The Real Malcolm Steadman.

With the first story arc to Existential Terror and Breakfast done I would like to take the time to talk about one of my favorite blogs on the internet. Out there in the grand ocean of personal blogs is one called “Philosophise Now”. One part philosophy and equal parts activism, Philosophise Now is written by a real life Malcolm Steadman. Instead of cowering in fear of the terrible epiphanies, however, this writer embraces what he has learned and unlike Malcolm, has a voracious need to consume the existential. Enter Carlos Serrano, and in his own words:

Hello, I am Carlos and I am an addict.

Image courtesy of Philosophise Now!

Carlos went down a philosophical rabbit hole, reading and purchasing every bit of information that could expand his worldview. Nothing can sate this man’s need for the truth and he vehemently believes that the world can be a better place if more people embraced philosophy.

With that said, his worldviews are constantly changing. His blog is like a raw nerve reaction to the content he is exposing himself to, and thus we get to see a philosopher in the making in real-time. Carlos is not one to shy at the idea that his views can be shattered and he embraces growth. While my character Malcolm is completely ruined by these kinds of things, Carlos becomes better for it.

If you have time check out his blog here:

I especially recommend his article Reality will beat your stupid post-truth, or will it?

Join me next week for a new issue of Mr. Square and for the first chapter of my second story arc for

You Kant have Breakfast

Existential Terror and Breakfast: Day Zero

Epiphanies taste better with toast.


Malcolm was thinking clearly. Clearly, Malcolm was thinking, and thinking clearly came with clearly thinking. Malcolm was thinking.

Everything is okay. Nothing is wrong with Malcolm and everything is going to be fine.

Malcolm was thinking clearly. It really was a great idea.

Malcolm’s breakfast looked incredibly alluring as steam rose from the freshly cooked scrambled eggs and bacon. This pairing of food was a normal breakfast, if not the most normal breakfast, and Malcolm was perfectly normal. Adding Tabasco sauce on his eggs was a popular thing to do and though his third cup of coffee might be excessive plenty of people needed an extra kick to start their day. The whiskey in the coffee just meant that, aside from being your everyday average person, Malcolm Steadman was also fun! He was unemployed, a little bit of day drinking was okay. Malcolm was having fun!Continue reading →